The Mess We're In
by Tea Bush
Summary: Is it easy enough for people to just live on after finding they don't have anything to live for? PG - Just in case... It will turn up as an SS yaoi (not in this chap, though). Don't read if you don't like.


I haven't been here for a while. I haven't done any fics in a while, too. But, you know, something lingered. And when I was surfing the net I saw one particular person setting up a contest for FF8 yaoi fics. She was one of the people to be my first reviewers... I did not enter the contest, but in the end it got me going. So here it goes - once again. The story is told from the perspectives of different people - don't let this distract you. And, yes, all the epigraphs were taken from a song by PJ Harvey.  
  
Disclaimer: FF8 characters aren't mine. And don't pretend you didn't know it already. Warning: it looks all too innocent at the moment, but it'll eventually turn up as SxS yaoi. And again, don't even try to pretend you didn't know it.  
  
The Mess We're In  
  
You met me  
  
I think it's Wednesday  
  
The evening, the mess we're in  
  
1  
  
Light summer breeze came from the sea. It gently touched the little flag in front of the inn, making it wave back and forth, and stroked the brown hair of a young man standing in front of it. He did not notice it though, because all of his attention was focused on a small yellow piece of paper he was holding.  
  
He read it once again. Somebody invited him here, telling only the date and the time, and now he was thinking that coming here was possibly the most careless thing he had done during the last four years. He did not care, though. Not anymore. They've said twenty-one was too young an age to loose interest in life, but did it really matter? Anyhow, when he received this, something inside him stirred in familiar, yet forgotten, manner. For a change, finding the one who had sent this could prove to be entertaining, or so he thought at the moment. So he took some things of basic necessity, stuffed them into a backpack, and headed for the train station.  
  
And now here he was, in the right place and in the set time, but there were no signs of anyone waiting for him. Perhaps it was just a joke? Something, still, was telling him that it was not. He stared at the sea, thinking of the person who had sent him this telegram. Well, basically, it could be anyone. Anyone at all - but no one was coming. "Yes. It was merely a joke," he thought. "And a bad one." He turned back to the inn doors, determined to pack his possessions and leave with the first train available, but the thing he saw nearly made him jump. A young blonde woman was standing right before him, smiling and looking at him curiously.  
  
"What's wrong?" she inquired. "Don't recognize your old friends, do you?"  
  
He laughed, she hurried forward and they hugged each other. "Quistis! So it's you!"  
  
"A most clever observation, as always," she giggled. "Let's go inside, I'm tired as hell and all I want is to sit down. How are you, Squall?"  
  
"All right, I think," he said, looking down, as they stepped through the inn doors into the lobby.  
  
"Couldn't guess that by the tone of your voice," Quistis remarked.  
  
Squall smiled skeptically and they sat down onto the lobby sofa. The door opened and closed once again, allowing a group of people inside. "So that was your idea?" He asked, handing the telegram to her.  
  
"Sure." She smiled. "You know, I kept on thinking, if all of us just-"  
  
"-Could meet up all together once again?" A familiar voice continued. They raised their heads to discover a blonde man standing next to their spot, listening to their conversation. Wrapped in a gray cloak, holding a small suitcase, he looked at them, waiting for their reaction. Quistis stood up and he gave her a firm embrace. "Hello," he said, releasing her and reaching out to shake hands with Squall. "It's great to see you two." Squall sighed. "Hi, Seifer," he said simply.  
  
***  
  
"Well," Quistis said, taking a sip from her glass, observing the cozy interior of the harbor cafe, "I don't understand it."  
  
"But it is so," Squall insisted. "I haven't seen anyone from our old gang for almost four years now."  
  
"Neither have I," Seifer confirmed, nodding. "Fuu sends me postcards from time to time, though."  
  
"I thought it was just me, loosing my touch with everybody because of my work." Quistis frowned. "So when I heard they're going to send somebody to Balamb, I made sure it'd be me. I figured we all could use being together for at least some hours, so I called Irvine and Selphie, and sent a telegram to each one of you two, Zell, and Rinoa."  
  
"Ah, our fellow instructor have suffered a sudden fit of nostalgia," Seifer stated. "How cute."  
  
Quistis prepared to retort with some equal remark, but then decided against it. For sure, Seifer's words were sarcastic, as he has always been, but this time he was neither aggressive, nor bitter. "Former instructor," she replied softly. "But something tells me I was not the only one to experience the nostalgic mood. After all, you are here, right?"  
  
Seifer nodded, admitting her words. "He has really changed," Quistis thought to herself. "Maybe grew up at last?"  
  
"So where is everybody else?" Squall wondered.  
  
Quistis shook her head. "Selphie said she was ill. And she is, really. Because, you know, of all the people she'd be the first to get here, if she was okay. Irvine has lots of work, or, at least, he made it sound like that. I don't want to say I did not believe him, but I think he has his own reasons for not being here. Now, who's next? Oh yes. Mrs. Dincht replied to my telegram, she called me back. I was nearly shocked. I thought I'd find Zell staying here at Balamb, as he always claimed to want... But Mrs. Dincht said he's in the big city now, getting his first real full-time job. She tried to make it sound very soft, but the idea was - Zell did not want to come here and see us."  
  
"Can't blame him for not wanting to see me," Seifer said. "But what's wrong with seeing you?"  
  
"Perhaps he thought it's in some way painful?" Squall suggested.  
  
"Oh, come on! Painful? No, it's Zell, remember?"  
  
Squall blinked. "What about the others, than?"  
  
"The others..." Quistis made a pause. "You mean Rinoa, right? Actually, when I mailed her, I thought I'd reach you also. I had absolutely no idea you broke up. Why in the world -"  
  
Squall interrupted her. "I'd prefer not to discuss this subject." Seifer let out a heartless chuckle.  
  
"Okay," Quistis agreed eagerly. She did not really want to start speaking about the reasons of people breaking up, because it could easily lead up to some questions concerning her own current relationships. "Well, as to her, she just was not interested. She said that, of course, she did share some nice moments with us, but - that's gone now. She was rather cold, actually. Rinoa was the last person whom I was contacting. And I was surprised to find out that you've gone to your father's place. So I was in a great hurry and forgot to sign the message I sent you."  
  
Thus, there was no secret, not the slightest sight of intrigue behind the telegram. Mere forgetfulness. Squall wondered whether he would come here or not, knowing who, and why, was inviting him here.  
  
***  
  
The conversation had stopped for the moment. We were sitting there in silence, feeling strange and somehow shameful. The two ex-rivals were trying not to look at each other directly. The silence was rather long, and I felt guilty for it, well, being the one responsible for this, possibly unsuccessful, reunion. So I started again.  
  
"Do you know what day is it today?" I asked. They gazed at me, thinking, I'm sure, that it was a rhetorical question. "Oh come on," I continued, "don't you remember? It's our anniversary!"  
  
Seifer turned his head away. "Not much of an anniversary for me, I believe." He was a little hurt, perhaps, but at least he definitely understood what I was talking about. Squall, however, remained clueless. He raised an eyebrow, uttering something like "Hmmm?"  
  
"Don't you remember, Squall?" I continued. He shook his head. "I dunno."  
  
"It's the day you've defeated Ulti-The-Bad-Girl four years ago, silly," Seifer said. I saw that joking on this topic was hard for him. Nevertheless, he was doing his best to keep the dialogue alive. I thanked him in my mind.  
  
A shadow ran over Squall's face. "Oh, this." The saying, once again, had pushed the chat to the point of extinction. It was getting more uncomfortable with every minute; not the way I imagined the sweet chitchat between the old pals should feel. I tried to voice my thoughts.  
  
"Let's talk about something!" I demanded. "I was dying to know how did you do, and all other who-where-what things, and you're not telling me anything. I hoped to see my childhood friends, to exchange something with them! To make it feel nice, like it used to be... I have only two hours to spend with you before my train leaves, and..." I stopped. It was difficult to continue.  
  
"What do you mean, two hours?" Squall asked. Seifer looked puzzled, too.  
  
"Well, my trip is a business one," I said. "The people I work with are very demanding, you see. So I tried to finish all my work here as fast as I could, to have more time to spend with you... And all I've got is two hours. It is not much, I know, but at least it's something."  
  
"Why didn't you say so from the very beginning?" Squall asked. And, to my relief, I sensed the momentary embarrassment fading away.  
  
And for the next two hours I felt really happy. When I told them about my time limit, everything went different. It was like a sudden gust of wind in the midst of a dead calm, like a breaking of an iceberg, or something similar. I mean, we actually started talking - all together, telling each other some weird stories, and letting know almost everything we had to offer. I told them about my job and the wonderful people I've met during my trips, Squall commented on living with his father, Seifer recalled the last times we've been together - and we were going on, and on, and on, until it was the time for me to go. They walked me to the station, I boarded the train and looked out of the window. The train started moving. Squall and Seifer waved to me, and I waved, too, while I was still able to see them. Then the Balamb station disappeared from view, I sat back on my seat and closed my eyes. Meeting these two was wonderful. I was absolutely sure we will try to meet again sometime, and wondered what of all things had prevented us from doing this earlier.  
  
----  
  
So this was the first part. Eventually I'll get to posting the second. 


End file.
